Red Hook is more than just a place to go to procure cheap particle board bookcases or shop for produce with a panoramic view.

Wandering the cobble stone streets of Red Hook truly feels like a getaway. Due to its relative isolation and tight knit community of residents and small businesses, Red Hook has a feel more reminiscent of a beach town than big city borough. Follow the plan below for a full day of painting Red Hook red.

1:00 PM - Brooklyn Crab: You can easily spend most of your afternoon here. There are three floors dedicated to drinking and dining, but request a table on the top floor for the best views and waterfront breeze. There will likely be a wait, but there is plenty to do (and drink) to occupy your time: arcade games + free rounds of corn hole (worst name for a game ever), 8 hole mini-golf and shuffleboard.

3:00 PM - Steve's Authentic Key Lime Pies: Use the bathroom at Brooklyn Crab before leaving, because there are no bathrooms here. The regular key lime pie is delicious, but the frozen, chocolate covered "Swingle" is the way to go. Hang at the picnic tables out front or relax in the small waterfront park just to the right for a view of The Statue of Liberty (send these, the Swingles, chocolate-dipped to me).

where you will eat steve's authentic key lime pie

3:30 PM - Red Hook Winery: Head to the end of pier 41, just behind Steve's Authentic (follow the signs), where you can select from dozens of varieties of local red and white wine by ordering a fully customizable wine flight (three, six or eight glasses per flight).

4:00 PM - Here you have a choice to make:

Interior courtyard (with chickens!) at cacao prieto

Option 1 - Cacao Prieto Distillery: Tour the Cacao Prieto Distillery and sample bourbon, rum and chocolate made on the premises.
Option 2 - BWAC (Brooklyn Waterfront Artists Coalition): Head to a 25,000 square foot gallery housed in a Civil War era warehouse featuring the work of emerging Brooklyn artists.

5:00 PM - Botanica: With cocktails made from rum, cacao liqueur and bourbon made next door in the Cacao Prieto Distillery, Botanica is a great pit stop for a pre-dinner cocktail.

PATRIOTIC PIG SMOKIN at hometown bar-b-que

6:00 PM - Another choice:

hope & anchor's surprisingly tasty turkey burger (who ever says that about a turkey burger?)

Option 1 - Hometown Bar-B-Que:Because Hometown was recently named New York's best barbecue restaurant, there will definitely be a long line. If you're down to brave it, order some brisket, the lamb belly (baaaah-b-que) and a jalapeno-cheddar sausage link.
Option 2 - Hope & Anchor: Although Hope & Anchor was a recent runner up for Brooklyn's best burger, you will not experience the same wait as you would cuing up for barbecue. The burgers are great and there are tons of varieties, including several non-beef options. Most are $10 (except for the salmon and lamb burgers) and include fries or mixed greens. Bonus: beginning at 9:00 PM, drag queen Dropsy Desmund hosts free karaoke.

8:30 PM - Sunny's Bar: If you're not staying for karaoke at Hope & Anchor, head to Sunny's, a rickety old bar dating back to 1890, to finish off your night. On Saturdays at 10:00 PM, you'll find an informal bluegrass session in the back room. If that interests you, find a seat right as you arrive because the place gets crowded. Otherwise, have a few drinks at the bar up front to celebrate the day you just crushed.

Essential Info:

-Total Cost: From $60-$125 per person for the entire day, depending upon lunch and dinner orders (if you splurge on oysters, crab and barbecue, this will definitely be higher). Cost includes all tax and gratuity.

-The best way to get to Red Hook is by taking the free IKEA ferry departing from Pier 11 in the Financial District, Manhattan. Check the schedule for departure times.

-Tours at Cacao Prieto occur at 2:00 PM and 4:00 PM and are $15 per person. They can sometimes be long and verbose (we're talking an hour +), so unless you geek out on this sort of stuff, skip the tour, buy a chocolate bar to snack on and sample the spirits next door at Botanica. Also note, the distillery is open air with no heat/AC, so dress accordingly for the tour.

-BWAC is free, but accepts cash donations. Each year there are three month-long exhibitions, occurring in the spring, summer and fall. The gallery is only open on the weekends from 2:00-6:00 PM during those shows, so make sure to check the website calendar in advance.

-Steve's Authentic Key Lime Pies' hours on the weekends are somewhat nebulous ("11-ish till sundown"). Depending upon the season, hours can change dramatically, so check the website in advance.

-Red Hook Winery offers tastings until 5:00 PM.

-Hope & Anchor gets busy during Karaoke, but they do accept reservations for groups.

-Sunny's Bar is cash only.